I guess I should write a few words about turning 70 today before the birthday party starts. I guess it's somewhat of an accomplishment for me to have reached this age, especially since I haven't really lived my life, although somewhat of a shy man, in a shy way. I've buried quite a few younger friends that were killed and I was just lucky not to be with them when their deaths occurred - driving drunk or sober, cars and motorcycles (I'm not proud of it) we were rebels in our own minds. I've associated with loving dogs, high-strung racehorses, no-tail kitty cat and cats with tails (they swing well through an open doorway) clucking chickens, pouting pigeons, belligerent little budgies, tropical fish and obstinate goats. I've rubbed shoulders with pimps, prostitutes, preachers and a lot of other people that start with the letter 'P' and girlfriends and lovers - I don't have enough fingers and toes to count them all. Only two wives - both very good and caring women - don't know what they ever saw in me but I'm thankful for their love. Did I mention I have kids - well I do - 5 girls and 1 boy - grand kids 2 - both boys (odd that my name ends with me). Not everyone gets to have 2 mothers but I did and they were good for me - taught me a lot about who I am today. and my dad - he was a very special man in my life - a big part of him is me and I'm proud to say that the good part of me is mostly him.
There's really nothing very special about reaching the age of 70 - I don't feel any different than I did yesterday and I was 69 then. It's like a lot of people believe I guess - age is just a number. Sure I've got aches and pains, I grumble and I bitch, hair, mustache and eyebrows are white (least I got hair), missing some teeth - the end of my thumb (friggin' motorcycle chewed the end off - must have been hungry) I've got wrinkles that a hot iron can't remove but hey - I don't need a wheelchair, cane, walker or colostomy (no idea how to spell that word) bag - still wear jeans and not Depends - my mind is still as sharp as a dull pencil and hey - sex is still a big highlight in my aging life - don't need no Viagra, no pin-up magazines, porno videos to make Mr. Happy, happy - my wife still turns me on like the very first time - won't tell you how old I was or who she was - secrets are secrets and some should never be divulged.
I've had some interesting and not too interesting jobs during my life - been a paperboy (can you believe I was fired?) a hot-walker, a groom (spent 10 years on a racetrack), stocked shelves at K-Mart, TV art director, commercial artist and sign painter - did I mention silk-screener (pulled a squeegee for miles manufacturing - "Oh thank heaven" 7-Eleven signs) was a bookie for a short while and was asked if I would be a pimp - can't believe some of the places I used to hang in and the people I hung with). And oh yeah - I had my own business too - complete with employees and everything that goes with the powers of being one's own boss. Been a gambler, a boozer and a midnight lover - of course they weren't jobs - just lost my money and a lot of self-respect. I've been a logger, did a wee stint in the army (me and orders just don't get along - there's that rebel in me again sounding off) and was even a demolisher - tore down a few buildings in my time. It wasn't a job, but I've been a sailor - sailed the North Pacific, the Bering Sea and the Arctic Ocean - why hell - I even sailed through the Northwest Passage on quite likely the smallest sailboat to ever traverse that icy course - Dove III.
Education - yeah I've got education - Grade 12 and can you believe I have initials I can put after my name - a BA in art. Oh yeah, I've been a teacher, given seminars, rubbed shoulders with millionaires and been very close to being one myself (earned it all and lost it all -but had more fun losing my last 20 bucks on a longshot and going hungry for a day or two). I can literally say, I've been stomped on, bucked off and dragged - even had a so called friend punch out my front teeth - even been in a couple of bar room brawls - I was the guy crawling out the door - bloody hell but I hate pain!) I've been knocked out with a crib board over the head - a knife and pitchfork at my throat - i won't talk about the jealous husbands - what they don't know won't hurt them. Yeah, I've got education - most of it out behind the barn and just the plain old education of getting through one day and then the next.
At age 70, yeah, my body's heading south to a 6' hole in the ground and it's a slippery slide without a hand-hold but I'm not giving up easy - I've still got my dreams and I just know my f_ _ _ing bucket list will never be emptied - I've got things to do now and things I want to do in the future - why heck - if there's a heaven or hell - I'll bet there'll be things I'll be wanting to do there too - most likely escape is what I'm thinking (once a rebel; always a rebel). I've been accused about having a Peter Pan syndrome but I like to think, not so much that I never grew up but that I've got an insatiable desire to continue dreaming - yeah, I'm a dreamer and a bloody good one too. Right now - I'm dreaming about the case of beer my son-in-law James is bringing to me for my birthday very soon - what a surprise last evening and quite likely the best present I could get for my birthday - my daughter - did I mention my beautiful and caring daughter Brandi showed up from Toronto with Ethan my grandson - yup - can taste that cold Alexander Keith Pale Ale already - cheers eh!
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